Auris, why are you up?

 IDK

i was sleepy earlier but then Andre called. It messed it all up.

And I ate that sandwich after putting my son to sleep. guess that got me up. Also looking at the light.

But I read a post about, what, no internet or phone for 2 hours before sleep.

It would be good to put that as a rule again.

I am thinking of Marvin, he was trying to touch my butt or something. I'm like we never partied like that. But it just shows me, he was successful and was in New Brunswick working for a company. I have what people don't have, the beauty, the personality, that ability to shine. 

But I didn't have what other people have, which is money. He was introvert and was doing the accounting thing since he was in high school. He worked with an entrepreneur that wanted to sell glasses in Dominican Republic. I remember. 

Then met him in NB and he was doing good. And there I am, struggling and trying to figure it out.

Auris, settle. Even birds sometimes have to rest sometimes. Settle down. But I am settled!

Still your ideas are all over. How will you make money? What is going to be it for you? 

Is the answer in one of these webinars you keep looking at?

I want financial security. So I can go ahead and do my ideas. My crazy dream ideas that I love.

Building a crane in the sky, one day someone thought of that idea. 

Currency is a current. It's in the word. What is the currency of money? 

Currency, lift it up. Service others, no longer going through the employer of a bank. How to make money?

Last time I sang in the mall, first time I got paid for singing. Doing poetry, I have never gotten paid for that. But then again, I never got published. 

I am up to think, to live. I wake up at 11am so is it normal for me to go to sleep late?

How often do I sleep? I don't really care. I just wonder when will I figure it out. I forget about things, always absorbing new things. But this is precisely what I want to do, no.

Get to the cleaning, do the closets. Get the plants, have a peaceful office. And figure out activities for Alex to do. He has been watching TV all day for like 3 months. I want to give him something else to do, but what? 

Lesly said she will send a tablet. I just have no idea what to do. I want to pay and have someone come and teach him but that is taking the easy way out. I just feel like everyday passes and I miss it. His schooling, he is not learning anything. Watching cartoons all day. I rather him learn how to make games and learn how to code. Take that same thing he likes and watch him get good at it. 

Like the man say, let the kid play with what they want. His kid does cartwheels and all kind of stuff and he didn't teach it to her. It is a different conversation.

I remember when I went to PCC, I liked that I could be part of that conversation. The what its like to be a parent conversation. The world didn't change, but I did. It will be the same thing when I learn to invest. I will be able to talk about stocks and companies and share that world with other investors.

What kind of investors are you? I'm a dividend only passive income investor. OR I am a fundamentals investor. OR I do options on red days. Look at me using these words like I know what they mean. But sometimes its good to be part of a conversation, you pick up things without realizing that you are picking it up. 

The vending machine for $300 dollars is soooo interesting. I don't have a car but surely there must be a way. There has to be a way. Don't let not having a car stop you, Auris. You did that for many years, oh I don't have a car. don't' have a job. cant get a good job because I don't have a car. I remember all of that. I never knew what it was, that comfort of having a car and that responsibility. The cleaning, the paying the insurance. The wanting to go everywhere. The not having to walk the streets and take trains.

It's so crazy because that is not my reality anymore. And I am so glad. I'm like there has to be a way for my life to be more efficient. Isn't that how this whole thing started? I'm like daycare if over here, work is over here, home is over here. So inefficient. I need everything to be close together. For the family to not have to go to all these different places. We can accomplish so much more.

The house with the garden in the back is going to be so beautiful. It's like define your dream. Make it clear. Make is wise, of course you are going to get what you want. But how specific are you about it? Make it plain, make it clear. They saw the vision and they ran. 

Auris, what is up with the life insurance? 40k a month doesn't move you? someone made that right. Right.. What is going on? Am I making excuses. I need the money desperately. Its just when I saw the people doing the calls I instantly grew bored. I'm like really, this is going to be it?

I rather create a company and have a service and have clients. It's just like ugh. I didn't like that environment. Eat shit. That's what Kevin Hart would say. Eat shit. Until you don't have to do it anymore. 

Horrible way to look at it. Actually, no he said you don't have to eat a shit sandwich. His way of saying you don't have to put up with people's crap. It's up to you to leave that situation.  One thing I learned about Kevin Hart from reading the book 1. he was pounding the pavement for a long time. 2. he had a clear vision and not making money did not stop him. He believed so much in himself and what he wanted to do, he just kept on doing it. It took a lot of failure for him to become who he is today. 3. He had horrible worst money problems when he filmed one of his comedies that took him to super stardom. It was so funny I remember Claudia's man would play it in the car just so that it would make us laugh. Anyhow, he was broke and everything was on the line. He had just messed up his girlfriend's mom's credit and he went out there and killed it. He performed. He laughed. He had a smile on the whole time. That was amazing. The boats were burned and you had to kill it, you had to make it, immense pressure. 3. things are not what they seem. Movie seem so glamorous but it is actually so much work. He described his schedule and I would hate it. Waiting around all day for a scene then you gotta kill it when it does come. Made me realize when I make movies, I want to be in charge of the schedule and do it with a small cast to make a story.