Toastmasters Speech 1: Icebreaker Who is Auris? (my origin story)

My name is Auris. 

I am from  an island called Dominican Republic, it's tropical and beautiful and we eat a lot of coconuts and green plantains. I come from a family where my grandfather had 13 kids. So I come from a big family of aunts, uncles, and countless cousins. My whole family is as of now migrated to USA except for 1 uncle (lawyer) and 1 aunt (doctor). The rest moved their families in the hope for a better life, and more opportunities. 

I come from a country that no matter how much you study, how much you work, you will always be poor. Of course there are exceptions like Sammy Sosa that lives in a mansion in a mountain somewhere.

But of course, he made his money outside of the island.  My uncle is a lawyer and he works never. My aunt is a doctor and she would work maybe 3 hours a day. The rest was in her home. 

Living in a country where nothing is figured out, the laws are flexible like Playdough.

When I was growing up, I lived down the street from the what Americans would call the White House. It housed the president and it had gates and gardens and the house was deep after the gate. Not having the door right on the concrete ground like ours. Inside was Balaguel, he was our blind president. People complained that he was blind but he kept getting reelected. 

I would wake up, Tia would do my hair my sisters' hair. I would endure the pain then we would put our blue uniform shirt, nice and ironed and our shorts or skirts and shoes. Going to school was something we were proud of. It was nice to have a nice clean uniform and shiny shoes. The best part of my day was morning. We would walk to school. At the corner, I would see where the president lived, and I would wave even though I knew he probably didn't see me. Then afterwards, there would be this park. 

One of the most vivid memories I've ever had was one time we passed in the park in this morning, and there was a man that was waking up in a bench. He looked really bad and scary and next to him, on the floor was a pool of green vomit. It was obvious that it was Presidente, the most popular beer in my country. That day I made a decision to never be that guy. And until this day, I am not into liquor or drinking. I hate the way alcohol taste and I am happy that finally I am not around people that constantly keep pushing alcoholic drinks on me. I don't like alcohol, so never offer it to me. 

My mom decided to go to the United States, my uncle told her to. He sold her on the American dream. No it wasn't to buy a house, it was to come and her kids could get educated and have better opportunities. My mom had 2 kids, 2 girls and a boy. The laws only allowed her to bring one, so she brought my older brother Cesar and left me and my sister with my aunt. I would not be the person that I am today without my aunt. I am her.

I am originally shy and stayed in a corner. I was afraid to be seen. Many times when I was little, what I liked to do was go into a room and hide. I would sit in the dark and just be there, waiting to see if anyone noticed I was gone. Another time I hide in my room and peeked through the door at the dining table. I wondered if anyone would notice I was missing, this time I hid out with my cousin Denisse. 

My aunt got me. She would come where I was. She would hug me, she would tell me that she loved me and she wiped my tears away when I would say why did my mother leave me? She said my mother loved me and she will come back for me.

I had a weekend dad. He would come on Saturdays and take us to amazing places. He always had a container for water or juice in the car, by the gear stick. My dad drilled into me to get an education. He always said I must become a professional. It wasn't until I accomplished it, graduating college from Rutgers in 2008 that I wondered, a professional what? One of my favorite childhood memories with my dad was the time he took us to a museum. There was a gigantic structure of a dinosaur. It reached the ceiling. And you could see all the bones. It was absolutely amazing. 

My cousin Marcus also had a dad that wasn't around. One time he came and he gave us candy. Marcus, Lesly and I always made fun of that moment. We thought it was hilarious. Until this day I have no recollection of what he looked like, we just remembered that he gave us candy and we loved him for it. 

Our aunt was our rock. A classic weekend was either going out somewhere and finding something to get into. My aunt loved finding places that had parties going on and forcing me to enter all the dance competitions. I would always win. She would be so proud of me. She is the one that taught me to dance. Other weekends we would stay in. We would lay on this bed in the living room. Marcus on the left side, Lesly on the bottom of Tia, and me in the left. One of my most memorable memories was a movie one time that had bugs everywhere. It was scary because there were bugs everywhere in the movie and it made you feel yucky like the bugs were on you. That whole night I kept looking at my pocket, thinking a bug was going to get out of it just like the movie. It never did.

My aunt taught me to be confident. When a lady came to recruit girls to model for a show, she pushed me to do it. The lady came during the week and we would practice at my other aunt's house (the doctor) that she lived down the street. My sister the lady said was 'a natural.' I was not. I kept practicing and practicing and put books on top of my head and kept walking not wanting it to fall down. When the show finally came, my mom came to the DR to get me and my sister. It was time for her to get us and come to the USA. The 6 years were up (she had to wait 6 years to get us a VISA). My mom brought over the shoes, and Lesly's shoe was missing. There were only 3 shoes, mine and only one for Lesly. So she didn't get to walk that day, after all those practicies and being a 'natural'. I got to walk and it was the scariest moment of my life. The runway was over a pool. And I remember being so little and having all those adult eyes on me. Afterwards, I walked around the pool and again, people kept looking at me. I had a fancy dress and fancy white shiny shoes. It was one of the best moments of my life, but I was sad that my sister didn't get to go. Once again, I had done something by my aunt pushing me to do it.

It affected me in that I kept doing that my whole life. I modeled in college and was not afraid to do shows and open mics and I kept performing for the rest of my life until I had a baby. I always sought out stages, when I was little I would run from them. The trick was, my aunt wanted me to do it and I would always get a good result. I would win the dance competition, or I would walk down the runway, and everything would be okay. I survived it, I did it, so it wasn't scary anymore.

My aunt pushed me to do things that I didn't want to do. She chased me and found me when I would hide and she would meet me in my brokenness, a girl whose parents were not around and was struggling with that fact. She loved me, hugged me, constantly bragged about me in front of adults. She was a great cook and a great mom. I love her with all my heart. I realized last year that the way I parent it was the way she parented me. I kept going to parks, museums, everywhere with my kid on the weekends. I was never home! one day I realized wow, I have been doing what she did without thinking about it. Even now moving to a warm weather climate, part of me is trying to recreate the happy times I had in childhood ( I wanted the sunlight and fresh air and being able to walk outside at any time.) I have made the right decision. and I am grateful my Tia Margot raised me, and that she made me the woman I am today.