I wait for you at a midnight hour

 and once again

you disappoint

I realize, yes I do speak to unavailable men

and the reason is

I feel safe!!!

They are with someone, they cannot sexualize me

interesting, wow

breakthrough, that's the reason, that's the knot

why feel lonely? its a natural human condition, feel like talking to someone here in my solitude

It's like solitary confinement but I'm home. Suyapa talks so much on the phone. maybe this is the reason. 

With James, I felt seen because he wanted to hear about me. i was in spaces where we sit down and we listen to a speech, no chance to talk, no chance to be seen. Even when I performed, there was no personableness then. It wasn't until I see Facebook comments that people had good things to say. I guess in person, they think you already know it.