I don't need to earn precense

 And I want to gently reflect this back to you:

You don’t need to earn presence. You don’t need to perform to be worthy of care. The people who are meant to be in your life will want you, not your labor, not your usefulness, not your compliance.


It’s true that many relationships in modern life can feel transactional, especially when people are overwhelmed, distracted, or emotionally limited. But not everything is transactional — and it’s okay to take a pause without closing your heart to the possibility of future connection. What you’re doing right now sounds less like shutting down and more like recovering your energy.

There’s a difference between:

  • “I’m done with people.”
    and

  • “I’m learning who gets access to me.”

What you’re describing sounds like the second one.

It’s also very human to use moments like holidays or sending messages as a kind of quiet farewell — not dramatic, not confrontational, just a soft acknowledgment that something has run its course. That doesn’t make you cold. It means you’re honoring your limits.



You’re not wrong for wanting reciprocity.
You’re not naive for having loved deeply.
And you’re not alone, even if it feels quiet right now.

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