Walks in the Park

 and you are, you want to have a conversation about  kicking us out Not what I was expecting after a weekend of making this place my own I got plants and a fish a comforter and a little tiny deer  I go to church starting thinking of how my church in in spanish, a language i wanted to connect with I saw that happen in Miami And the drumming, thought of how me and my son wanted  for him to learn the drums Dr Reyes says for me to stay put in my job and that she can maybe hire me for Fridays and Saturdays she needs someone. I told her i'm looking for a weekend job to pay the higher rent. She stays stay put, focus on yourself. Focus on your healing. Instability catches up to me again, Ive only been here but 10 days, My wound comes up, rejection and its met by the way I deal with it, pride. She says its not working for her and I have to give up the room. I speak to her and try to talk without showing too much emotion. I come to the room, I cry. I call Tia. I pray. I fall i...

 my room is taking shape i have 3 plants and 1 fish, the fish I always. wanted. Angel one time I expected him to get me one I was mad he didnt pick up o the hints.  I brought him what he needed, an umbrella on a rainy day when he was working He didnt give me a fish even though it was $1.  I got myself a fish, all these years later It's me allowing myself to have what I want and not wait around for someone to come around to help me with it all dreams, here I come. fish and plants. i have life in my room. and Alex too. I cant become like Tia and take too much on. I have to take care of myself.  But this is watering and feeding is doable. A Cycle of life.  Lady said to enter Facebook groups for plants and they will give advise on how to grow it. Such a difference for me and my son. He will be at lesly for 8 hours today while I work. I didnt want to drop him off at 8am. He is spending the morning with me.  Things I give up, can't do it all like I used to in Geo...

 Piece by piece, I have to bring together parts of life I love I wnat a house I want a real estate portfolio time is running out. not really, just passing. there is cyber security. of course i want to do estate planning lawyer. maybe later in life? i thought i would need to get married to do all these things, someone to support in watching Alex so that I can do things. but its 2024. its just simply not my life. i keep blocking what i want.  not able to attract it. wanted love, get narcs. want money, get bad jobs.  i am grateful for the opportunity. i'm skipping on the lesson. i wanted to work and be able to invest. did instagram lie to me?  its better to work no, than to have no opportunity and the hopelessness of that. but god, how good it was to wake up and talk to you and talk to Tia and be able to raise my son how i wanted. now i work and i don't spend as much time with him. i hope all that time all that i poured into him is good enough for now. i know some peopl...

 Today I reached happiness I walked out of work and walked Just walked for lunch break didnt feel pressure to eat. Ate after work, a dinner of drunk noodle Parts of my life that need to be organized: what to eat, weight to lose. I have moved to a new place that offers so many things: gym in front (cant quite afford yet) and bakeries and walk to school even though we did it only once on Monday now my son is off for a week. I'm draggin my feet into this job for bank, cannot imagine myself doing that. I also keep saying I applied for housing when I didnt. I think i find it easier to lie than to tell the truth: my dreams are way way bigger than this town. I rather not even do it. I cannot, for the life of me, can picture me living there in a place that makes me feel so horrible. Like the time i did laundry in 17th street. the place was attached to all these bad memories. I took Kenny on a drive yesterday, he was driving I was directing. All the spots I like, which basically are parks a...

 into the smallest possible space my soul screams and shots and sounds that get unheard I am in my room, singing for the first time ever and i hear a knock on the door reminder my space is shared, even in living. here its not my own oh Lord how I long for my own home where no one can kick me out and i can have friends over and it doesn't uproot my life the guy was lying because he wanted money someone to pay the rent so he doesnt have to we have nowhere to go but God guides and wisdom is great idk why he has to hide i'll send a text I guess

 its September 27, 2024 I'm still alive. son is 10. no car, no house, no hubby I have breath in my lungs and the memories and feelings of Miami Beach are slowly fading away yesterday I saw a picture of Edwards in 9th and ocean drive and I felt nothing no memory came back to me, no feeling of sun and sunshine on my body maybe its been too long for me to feel it I woke up from a dream where I was fighting with my mother in front of others, in a car. I was in the back. my mom was in the back. in real life she's never in the back. if the front represents power, she has it all. she holds the perception and the impossible requests she, I am tired of speaking of she I went to my sisters it s happy family. its a family unit. I don't feel part of it. I'm not part of the happiness. I feel like extra, like trash that needs to be taken out. this is how I feel. where do I feel alive? nowhere in my life right now. florida was cool but I was un housed so there was that. I saw apartmen...

 I go into instagram and it be suggesting all these careers and way to make money my desire is of course to have my own business have no skills? do I already have them? am I not who I'm supposed to be? how do I get to greatness I thought the word you told me would happen it kept me going 10 years ago now its 10 years later I've given my kid all I have I feel deflated need joy happiness, air inside my balloon I start yelling when I'm tired and he grunts at my talking most of our fights happen when we are late I see no one can bring me peace I knew that already if I can hack the brain and be successful I get overwhelmed so feel like hiding under a blanket show up to school and show up to work is like the minimum and that minimum is so hard we put our soul in the table for that I was so exhausted.

 walk in big mad not talkative big upset enrages me to see them in their happy little family while my world is falling apart when they need something  I'm expected to drop everything to help them when my household needs something feels like an option, an annoying request I needed a thermostat  got told to go to the hospital I needed laundry to get done for 2 weeks now, asked for help it didn't happen now I'm here washing uniforms in her house let's see if it happens if not I'll go to work with black and hope they don't fire me simple things laundry where to live getting to school on time nothing is right right now and now Venus wants to do a spontaneous bible study no thank you didn't know her back in my life would bring chaos not that she isn't but can't deal with people like that right now wanting to force a result I got the message thank you don't need a thorn in my side she'll probably get offended if she read this giving me solutions tha...

 i rather have a world loud bustling when i step outside i rather have my curiosity fed i do not level up inside i like my house to be my enclave my escape from the world a place i go to heal and rest and have plants and then go outside and learn things in school and do different things yah heard?

 is like me not having access to comfort like not having a blanket but she needs to comfort herself and focus on her and her baby that needs her i remember the call she was looking for a private space to even speak its hard for me to accept that she's better off without me there's been so much space and now there is so much space that we are not there for each other on anything life has moved on i leaned on God in Miami like never before yes talked to Jenny, she was a big help i all of a sudden had time nevagating that was difficult Zari helped me a lot somedays gave me the daily ticket fee right now, Melody is a burst of light. either way i have had to learn to live without her i cant call her when my emotions are too much she was always kind and nice  i called her when the thing with yomeiry was happening the last voice note we did she said how i said too much to her that she wished i didnt say it i was going through a lot but it made me feel like i need to be there for myse...

 like something I'm forced to do like spend time in a cemetery Brunswick was depressing to living with girls and hardly anymore who knew leaving bank would be so depressing met angel, fell too fast got a baby came back to bank life and mother and toxic and feeling powerless and no money how do people live, how do they overcome running away from all this and get a bit of peace and come back and have more thought Shar was sad but she was actually  traveling every weekend NY is different but she is so much fun i head about the flight attendant that bought 2 homes now what hope is there in this country but to leave? want to do my year in Florida, my dreams scream every night at me Sasholina and me are holding on to each other like two girls trying not to fall into the sea in the same ship wreck we believe different things and i cant listen to the voice notes i just cant Alaka I spoke to, he wants me to join the solar company and makes sales and also the wall st trapper thing I no ...

Hey this is what's going on I'll apply to everything let's see what happens then it turned into this strong thing and I feel misunderstood or like its unsaid I'm a bad mom because ultimately everything that happens to him is my fault he said speech therapist were wrong and principal is wrong and school is wrong they can provide more that what does it have to do with the doctors? to look into ADP and Florida has a scholarship program. that he can tell the parents that put a lot of work in and the parents that didn't and  Masters in Special Ed and tantrum is a thing with me thing Goodness a little overwhelming "I surprised he's thrived this long. he's not getting what he needs. could be dyslexia." can of worms, I uncovered a can of worms for real go online Denisse got married I'm right here don't get invited.... WTF? If it's any consolation, so did no one else. why do I want to be invited? it's a natural human thing.   I did invite ch...

Lately I've been afraid of you yes, I walk and supposed to talk with you hiding from my consciousness like its yesterday's news this is a new world and social media is what's used to connect  I'm introverted lately, always using the phone to get in touch with people I don't live near to I wished to make a life like you showed me I have a room and a bed on the floor talked to a guy that was short now that's done I see 2 weeks ago I was starting to feel empty I felt my strength growing, definitely miss  Mark's encouraging words This week has been so up and down I complained outside about Kathy wondering the whole time if its me and then not knowing what to do about it goodness, I just knew I need to change this. got something, money close to the floor. wishing I could do something that would mean something that would get me more. Yeah of course don't want to lose. I like having a room to go back to, a place to not be outside. We can sit, we can relax. no o...

 in this space best friend were are you kev no messages yet Jenny no answer yet so disconnected and then i wonder if im too annoying but its just how it is its hard to get used to this new reality kev i'm managing my disappointment obvi hard to not feel rejected but mostly i'm thinking of how i wished things could go i used to talk to the guy in the cardboard box he had a big ad in the florida sky sign it was so much, such rush of feeling i feel like over there i cared about the people i cared about them did they care about me am i so used to the chase that's just how it be? and why cannot I let go  and why do i think of them so much? i call rose every week when i was there i was so busy commuting, at least an hour or two each way my time in the beach, it was limited. would walk it and discover new things post because it was fun today I thought of newt and real estate  and when will I get into that build something, to show for. 

 thinking about you the promise the things God had said the future i planned,  the waiting, the believing, the action. i'm in a preparation season but like obviously of what I have on my side my son, myself and lack of investments lol I wanted you to come along and love me, of course I was looking to be all that you required, love being something in which you might have to give some things up to get what you wanted I had no idea I could find a well of water inside myself, peace and abundance inside of myself I want to become the me that I SEE owns real estate, has things and can easily give. teaches, guides, is valuable i spent so much time now i spend my time with the things i signed up for this year my sons's school, this job, this bootcamp. foundational, laying a brick with the desire to move so deep inside of me and afraid that life will be this, living someone else's life or filter grateful for the time together but missing the depth of deep conversations missing the d...

 underwear for mom socks for Alex a pink scrub or something would be nice. summer clothes are in mom's house. 

today i had a call and i was like what if i get into this career  and meet amazing uplifting career guided people like the person i was talking to it was like talking to myself the leadership and the likeliness its interesting you say el no me ha mandado mensaje este fin de semana la weekend y ya  i'm sure he'll text again and what should be the response? at least I'm glad I didnt follow his flow and in the space of being apart its helped me get back into mine and not be in anxiety, that was not cool

 - TDP helps me get real life experience -career prep best with people new to cyber security prep -look up job descriptions, am I ready? I said, how do I knew? Linked In workshop, resume shop, recordings for this year.  I will send those to you. In there are a lot of different documents.  Lot of tidbits and advice that I put in there.  Not BC related. things that I know that work. COMMON DENOMINATOR- THEY DID NOT APPLY FOR THE JOB through networking and recruiters. Don't rush this process. If you do, you will be part of the group that are struggling to get a job. Harder to get entry-level role, than a mid level and senior level job.  Don't have the experience. I have never been part of any other bootcamp. no other bootcamp I know of, whether to be 1 month or 4 month to work in part of a 500 fortune company. Building a PCI posture. never had PCI Compliance. Experience you'll be able to get here, and speak to in an interview is way more valuable than what is insid...

 a love that is all mine to be chosen to not be triggered by rejection  and past  and sinking feelings that go into the concrete like trash Kansas is 15 hours from beach, the lady said she went from there to NJ Cape May and she was happy because it was an hour away Everyone buys a home and sends kids to school, 15 years. Settle somewhere I feel like the butterfly Every day I fight the urge to move having a kid didn't change that in me to be honest didn't know I was so much like this until I went free the land I desire porque espero que el me diga algo? hoy mire a su cara, directamente el no se dio cuenta just like I thought, he was there I was correct in that assessment it would have been a mistake but yeah, it happened. I JUST HATE THAT IT ALL REMINDS ME OF ANGEL. YEAH, ANGEL THAT ASSHOLE. How all these emotions live in me the good the bad and I have access to them all control your emotions, do not give into the fears. it comes and goes. it comes and goes. I gotta rock m...

 how would you scope on the auditor side of PCI DSS? I need to see the inventory list. I need all your paperwork, all your policies. I believe working along with any network engineers will establish  your environment, what is your segmentation look like.  a lot of business, how are they goign to route all these services? any source, any destination. let's talk about. how are you securing this data? where is it at? that is important. another that the coucil provides. you establish your levels, your milestone. all those results will come along. what if the client does not store or process or transmit credit card data? how wold you  or maybe they are a service provider? who is your ASV. we need to know that to establish this assessment. the QSA will break it down. that AOC for you, we will establish, because you still have to make this extra research. we need to confirm that information. Q: if you are the QSA I will be soon. If you are the QSA and the client says we don...

Tips: Research the company Be honest (do you want to move? not particularly) Boyd Clewis, do it on evenings. Know the company. Talk about recent news and developments (Boyd mentions ghost stores) PARTICIPATING ORGANIZATION AND TRAINING FOR ISAs -Boyd said he told the last company what that would do for the company and the training that is available. If they would become a participating organization. Research what this is.  -Let the conversation flow, be yourself. Elevator speech- On PCI DSS is the framework that companies that store process or transmit credit card data have to abide by annually, now they have to be compliant everyday but compliance has to be validated annually.  And if for some reason we are not compliant there are fines and penalties associated with that and we can even lose the ability to process payments and so, ultimately this framework is the framework that we can use to stay out of the news for credit card breaches, data breaches those type of things. Q:...

 once you join the consulting groups and you start working the live assessments  first assignment is scoping with client whiskey.  haven't certified since 2021 5 regions around the world non- PCI compliance team

 and i cant sleep something is unrest in my soul, i can already feel it its been brewing i'm tired of speaking and not being understood i'm tired of being in charge of someone happiness not matter what i do i feel like theyre not happy i refuse to explain myself further why did you go away? why so far away? Can a psychologist tell you? if i have to tell you what is the point. the train, you didn't like the train i rode.  what does that have to do with me? i rode a train to visit you, you have a problem with that. and bring Alex into it. always alex always horrible, all i do. good enough for me, not for my kid. horrible horrible, horrible I'm sick of all this shit, for real scared I'll leave  call cops because walk is too long my independence threatens you we want you to be stable the new thing  its always a thing that I'm missing huh hubbie career now its stability Can I be left alone and that's it to fight this battle i have to care less idk what to do ever...

 1. business card (already has it) 2. pictures of finished work. 5. Ms. Alakas provide the tile.  bathroom- only replace the tiles in the floor re-grouting the bathroom shower tiles (walls) 6. we will let them know in 24 hours. 7. bumps in the wall to be sanded and to put compost so that the wall can be smooth (they have paint) 3. how many man hours to complete? 4. estimate for everything. broken down by price. let them know in 24 hours.  //////////////////// 1.someone in the apartment while they are working. not sure who is going to be there.  2. not to do the whole apartment at the same time, one room at a time. how many days? Cesar 1. losa- ceramica en la ducha es lo unica que se va a moder. Toilet has to be removed and the sink.

 TX plan coordinator -Get that patient to tell me what their needs are, then they can help me -We have to have confidence in the treatment, that we think its a good idea -They handle the financial arrangements. get those protocols, those guidelines set up.  business oriented, team oriented, having report with our coworkers 1) HANDLE ALL FINANCIAL ARRAGEMENTS 2) FOSTER RELATIONSHIPS 3) different between treatment presented and how much was completed presented vs accepted, know those numbers monthly and yearly. (How do we track this?) INSURANCE has been dictating terms for decades and decades. how to get best your insurance set up and run through it through the day the best way that you can while doing that you are talking about.  BACK FROM BREAK -give patient time to talk.  -she's used to more interactive classes. so its not her. she's not getting more of a response. -what are your thoughts on that? does that make sense to you? how does that fit into what you are visu...

 What is the role of the front desk? role of receptionist and dental assistant are the most underrated role. The person processing people coming in, scheduling right away. one of the most important positions in the office. you can have a great dentist and if the front staff is bad, he won't make as much money. front desk/  1. main role- productive scheduling. how you are lining up doctor exam and productivity. being chaotic is actually costing you money. the trend to being in network allowed for chaos. volume of patients coming in, so the patients need you more than you need them. end of day, exhausted. a. Front desk- everyone comes to the front desk. all the problems come to the front desk. if your too good at it, they stop trying to solve it on their own. we need to work together as a team. we need to get clinical staff on board. provide them with as much help as we can. 2. information and communication- we don't want to interrupt providers as they are working.  Morning...