So weak

 It was August 12th


I reach out August 24th


That is 12 days! Yes we didn't talk since August 6th 


but come on!!! You are like an addiction


Why could I not go longer? 


Reaching out to you, not letting you move on


It was enticing talking to you, pretending like I mattered,


Like I was something to you


and I have to accept that I am not, why do I keep looking for the love of the person that I lost?


What if I was married? What if I had moved on in the years since?


How would I have handled these emotions? Would I have had some sense?


Or would I just have pushed it back, would I have just moved it forward?


I am not sure I just remember me imagining moving on 


but still taking care of you


You held a special place in my heart for such a long time


and in a conversation, boom it's over. When it was only half time.



I was so weak, but it was only for a moment. I need to stop focusing on you.


You only sending me messages because I did it first. 


Okay, Auris breathe. Control yourself. Now, what to reply?


He could just have said nothing. But he is thinking I had something to say, but ugh


No se que mas decir


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