Andre

We spoke today

You were willing to talk about it

It was the first time I felt heard

You seem committed to work it out

I am not sure why

You wanted to talk again tonight

I said no, you agreed

I was able to tell you all the messed up ways I get to experience you

Selfish, you consume me like a drug until there is nothing left then throw me away

It's always the Andre show and we never get to me

My role is to consume you, and I am more than that

You admitted you like the Andre show. I said I know.

It's this feeling of being ignored. You talked about Sasha

and us having a threesome.

In some ways, you want me to be the muse and still want to paint me naked

That is where you head is at

What else? you said when you think of me you think of my smile and my shape

and all the times we've had, all the laughs

It's not all sexualized

I know that now. Do I? I talked about my trauma and how it informs the

way I get mad at men when they try to compliment. I don't understand

But I have to heal and having people around that sexualize me in any way

is just not good for me right now.

I need to know that it is safe for me to love and to be me and just safe

When I am being thought of in a sexualized way, I do not feel safe

That's where I am right now, and that is okay.

I'm tired of being broken. Just want to be complete.

I am complete, the recording says.