Letter to Aaron

I am allowed to miss my bestie. I am allowed to love the good memories. I am allowed to grieve what I lost, even if our friendship was complicated and even if I don't know what became of him.


There are times I miss you


It sucks I cant see you, call you, hear your voice, know how you are.


You made an impact to me. you mattered. you made me feel like I mattered.


You were a great person.


You had demons. you drank, you were looking for love. you had a questionable past. 


You were chaos, in the middle of storms. you caused storms, I later learned later on. 


I felt bad for loving you so, as you were not perfect. I'm not perfect either but loving you is something I wondered if should have happened. I felt guilty about it. For not seeing your brokenness earlier. for accepting you so much. 


It makes me feel bad to think. 


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