Yesterday

Forgive your mom

Let that anger go,

all the things she says

all the things she does.

The anger and frustration

the maybe I'm mad at myself for being in this situation

and she saying it: 'I feel so bad for him that he doesn't have a fasher'

and Alaka said its true

but when she says it I feel like I'm tired of it

The whole going behind my back

and never being able to have a direct conversation

and I'm sick of being a disappointment

I guess that's how I feel

If you say comments like there

It's always like I'm a horrible mother

You don't like how I feed him beans

and when I answer your questions, you don't believe me

So what's the point of answering them

It's always something wrong and a big drama

CHANGE DIRECTION AURIS, REVERSAL PATTERN

So I gotta change this narrative,

Alaka suggested I make a affirmation

and even what to say in the affirmation I was already resisting

He said: the affirmation should be, I have an amazing relationship with my mother. 

I immediately rejected that fact.

I FEEL LIKE CALLING SUYAPA. She experienced this. How was she able to let it go?

They seem to have a good relationship now. 

How to let go of the past?