Walks in the Park

 Piece by piece, I have to bring together parts of life I love I wnat a house I want a real estate portfolio time is running out. not really, just passing. there is cyber security. of course i want to do estate planning lawyer. maybe later in life? i thought i would need to get married to do all these things, someone to support in watching Alex so that I can do things. but its 2024. its just simply not my life. i keep blocking what i want.  not able to attract it. wanted love, get narcs. want money, get bad jobs.  i am grateful for the opportunity. i'm skipping on the lesson. i wanted to work and be able to invest. did instagram lie to me?  its better to work no, than to have no opportunity and the hopelessness of that. but god, how good it was to wake up and talk to you and talk to Tia and be able to raise my son how i wanted. now i work and i don't spend as much time with him. i hope all that time all that i poured into him is good enough for now. i know some people work so m

 Today I reached happiness I walked out of work and walked Just walked for lunch break didnt feel pressure to eat. Ate after work, a dinner of drunk noodle Parts of my life that need to be organized: what to eat, weight to lose. I have moved to a new place that offers so many things: gym in front (cant quite afford yet) and bakeries and walk to school even though we did it only once on Monday now my son is off for a week. I'm draggin my feet into this job for bank, cannot imagine myself doing that. I also keep saying I applied for housing when I didnt. I think i find it easier to lie than to tell the truth: my dreams are way way bigger than this town. I rather not even do it. I cannot, for the life of me, can picture me living there in a place that makes me feel so horrible. Like the time i did laundry in 17th street. the place was attached to all these bad memories. I took Kenny on a drive yesterday, he was driving I was directing. All the spots I like, which basically are parks a