Walks in the Park

 broken promises broken dreams all the plans that now will not be we all want to be loved  in return my love is a gift i give without much requirements but oh God how i hate that you could make such a swift movement and there are things that you dont like about me i didnt know we needed to agree on everything i want to watch a movie. but where? where do i have privacy? where can i live?

 saying if I was more stable Alex wouldn't pee she took something I told her thought we were friends thoughts she cared about me and Alex but no, it was all gossip like old lady said, she showed me her character. she collects info said I'm pretty and that bomb right there and told me where I should live seems mom made her case and convinced all of them they want me back to my place of bondage like slavery I was in happy land wanting to meet my sister's kid she wanted to use me and only watch my kid when it was convenient to them like boom I don't want to be there stop putting myself in situations I don't want to be in due to guilt the truth is they cant help but be themselves and the truth is they are disrespectful and don't appreciate me or get me the codependency workshop was super cool she said something like I don't like spending time with  people  who emotionally or verbally abuse me fir ne, men have something i have always wanted time around men my bod...

 I wish I could say it was the last time or the first time that this time, this is the first time I was sad, yes shocked, yes but the pain, the pain was away  in a place in my soul too far away for me to connect with the feeling I called Jenny and told her the whole thing and even I don't know if she got it she said what if Alfredo reaches out in the future I say in a future that is not here I will make a decision just like I'm making decisions now I will be fine Did she see something I don't see? Jenny asked I said no, she sees something I also see she's just not willing to put up with it but I have such a tolerance for bullshit and being in environments that I don't belong What I learned today was 1. how intolerant Aysia is 2. how insensitive Alfredo was, he didn't even get that he cost me a friend similar to the day that I was about to get hit he told me to film a TikTok and get famous what an insensitive thing to say and what a idiotic thing to say he did sa...